Back To Work & Visits to Father!

It was tough returning to work today, I could have slept all day! Visited Father at lunchtime and fed him whilst eating my lunch at the same time – he seemed pleased that I was there. He was still in bed – I was hoping he would be sitting in a chair. The longer he stays in bed, the weaker he will become. The Nimbus mattress that was ordered last night is not here yet and the nurses had still not done the referral to the Speech and Language Team, to assess my Father's swallow – but they had by my third nag of the day!!! He can't drink any fluids until this assessment is carried out. He looked fairly ok, but didn't look any brighter than he did yesterday.

My sister Vivien who is on holiday this week, took Lucy to see Father this afternoon, whilst I was at work. I visited again this evening after work. Father look overjoyed to see me and reached out to hug me (very rare) and was very emotional this evening. He started to cry and said 'I want to go back to where I came from' – he was very distressed. I had to explain (as I have several times already over the last few days) that he was in hospital and that this was not his new home and promised he would be going back to the care home and he looked at me with sadness in his eyes and said in a questioning voice 'promise?' and I replied 'I promise' – he looked relieved and settled when I said this, but twice asked me 'when?' and 'how long?' – I replied about a week and that he would be back before my birthday. He held onto my hand the entire time I was there. I sat on the chair with my feet on a stool and lounged against the side of the bed rails – we were both exhausted and just sat for ages, holding hands in silence. It was extremely hard to tear myself away when he was in this state, but he did not look sad when I left, when I promised to come and see him again tomorrow. Tough times.