It took ALL day to listen to music, re-listen and make decisions on what to play at Father's funeral. We had a break in-between and Vivien, her partner Ray, Lucy and I went to the The Firs NWT Visitor Centre at Holme for a jacket potato lunch which was very nice. Mother couldn't face going there and needed a break from 'all the noise'. It was raining all day with grey skies and because of this no one else wanted to walk around the reserves. We had a nice chat with Gary and reminisced about father. Gary reminded us of how he remembered father shaking salt on his tomatoes that he ate, from his bumper crop of tomato plants grown on the window sill of the observatory – how could I have forgotten that! So many memories.
We had planned to write an eulogy in the afternoon, but ran out of time. The music is very beautiful that we have chosen and brought tears to our eyes when we played it, particularly a piece that Lucy remembered that Father liked. It would be wonderful if Lucy could play her violin at the funeral, but there is no way she would be able to do it – we are all so sad, its going to be bad enough going to the funeral, never mind anything else.
We don't know how many people to cater for, I have no idea how many people will turn up, could be 20, 30, 50 or more, who knows! I don't think it will be that many to be honest. The most important thing is that we give him a respectful send off. I have to take Lucy to see Father this week, that will be a traumatic day, not looking forward to it at all. I miss him so much, I last saw him alive on the 16th February – I feel that I am way overdue to visit him at the care home, but of course he will never be there again.